Both Hands Up: Letters from Overseas: Dear Tammie, Emily Lee, and Amanda Nicol,

There were supposed to be three more posts to cover the rest of my trip in Vietnam. Each with a theme which directly related to one of the three of you. But for the sake of EVER getting back on track, I have combined those three posts into one MEGA-Post. So without further ado, I give you Vietnam in 10 stops or less:

1. Dalat:

Please note my reaction at 1:03 to the fact that, surprise! the rope doesn't go all the way down. Uh, what? I have to jump....from here? Well if that's the case...why don't I just make it an extremely painful spread eagle back flop. Great idea. Welcome to Dalat. My first stop on my Vietnamese journey north. Aside from partaking in adventure sports like this canyoning trip, I also visited a silk factory (yes, Tammie, you heard right) and began an affectionate relationship with Vietnamese drip coffee during unexpected torrential downpours.

Hi: Winning solitaire on my first try during torrential downpour while sipping first Vietnamese coffee

Lo: Winning solitaire on my first try during torrential downpour...now what?

Hero: Friendly Vietnamese/American who translates "I am allergic to MSG" for me so I don't die later on in this trip...

2. Mui Ne:

Mui Ne is a little tourist beach town on the southern Vietnamese coast. Originally, the plan was to skip over Mui Ne, but then again, when you are traveling alone, the "original plan" is a phrase often used only to compare with the "on a whim, cause I feel like it, why not plan." And of course, it was the latter which boarded me on a bus to the coast.

Hi: Lemongrass Tofu and a good book at a table on the beach

Lo: Leaving my ATM card in the ATM machine. Again.

Hero: Jung, the little boy who took me sledding in the sand dunes.

3. Hoi An:

I had been waiting four months to arrive in Hoi An. And four days later when I said goodbye, my bag was heavier by 3 pairs of custom designed shoes, two tailored suits, three shirts, four skinny ties, a vest, a winter coat and a pair of slacks. Not to mention that the fact that I got to go diving, eat incredible food (some of the cheapest at that) and happened across the lantern festival, when there is a mandatory power outage (save decorative lanterns) in the whole town and they float candles down the river.

Hi: When the french woman thought I was french, and then when I said, "american" she assumed Quebecois. Yesssssss.......

Lo: No electricity during Lantern Festival also means no fan in room at night.

Hero: My tailor. Excellent fit.

4. Marble Mountains - Hue - Dong Hoi

Caves, caves and more caves. And an elephant. There's nothing like a trip to Southeast Asia to rearrange your life plan. But after some careful considerations, I have decided that when I grow up (still saying that by the way) I want to be Indiana Jones. Or Lara Croft. But the latter may prove to be slightly more difficult.

Hi: Drinking and arm-wrestling with my hotel owner and his brothers. weird.

Lo: Note to self-when you get off the beaten path...bring an extra book...because reading english-vietnamese dictionaries are not thrilling...to say the least

Hero: The founder/owner of "QB teen" in Dong Hoi, because sometimes a hot dog and fries can make EVERYTHING better.

5. Sapa:

From Dong Hoi, I hopped on a sleeper bus to Hanoi, where I met up with Tom, an Aussie friend I made while canyoning in Dalat. One thing led to another, and before I knew it, I was loading a rented motorbike onto a night train while drinking Vietnamese Rice Vodka mixed with fanta in homemade aquafina bottle cups. Classy....

Sapa is incredibly beautiful. And having your own transportation makes it that much more striking as you climb through the cloud-covered mountains of Northern Vietnam. It took us about three times as long to make it from the train station in Lao Cai to the mountain town of Sapa, as we kept stopping to take in the the views. Once in Sapa, we had plenty of time to explore the little french-influenced town, interact with the local hill tribes, and partake in some pretty harrowing meals. Yes, you read correctly. Because you see, when you walk back to the bathroom by way of the kitchen, and see this:

You start to wonder which cage contributed to your lunch.

Hi: Learning how to count to 10 in H'mong

Lo: Allowing myself to be convinced to eat baby bird shish kebab fricasee. Does it get lower than that?

Hero: The guy who drove a motor bike with one hand, while holding a stick with live snake tied to the end of it in the other.

6. The Frontier:

With 5 days more to roam around on my motorbike, Tom and I decided to hit the road. Destination: the frontier. ooooooooooooooo. The Frontier is an area in the Ha Giang province in the far North of Vietnam. Right on the Chinese border. If you are not Vietnamese, you need a special permit to enter the zone, and getting that permit can be a real pain....just ask Tom. But it is so incredibly worth it. As you drive around on roads that are practically untouched by outsiders, you wind through various terrains from dirt red river valleys to black stony cliffs, green carved out mountainous peaks to the occasional unpaved thigh deep muddy slip'n'slide they call a road. And at the end of the path: China.

Hi: Surviving a 20 mile, 4 hour, unmarked, unpaved, obstacle course detour on a manual motorbike.

Lo: Crashing my motorbike in Hanoi, only 10 km from the end of our 9 day journey.

Hero: My carhartts for saving my body and my helmet for saving my life. (see next post)

7: Ha Long Bay and Cat Ba Island:

Nursing my wounds, I headed off on a 3-day pleasure cruise of Ha Long Bay. Sometimes after a traumatic experience like my motorbike crash, there is nothing better than a little R&R&K (rest and relaxation and karaoke). And while the picture above suggests quiet serenity, in my mind it says only one thing: Tom Jones, baby.

Hi: Keeping everyone on the boat awake with the fine karaoke stylings of Tom Jones' Sexbomb.

Lo: When the electricity went out, and cut us off right in the middle of our Sexbomb karaoke reunion tour the second night.

Hero: John Buckell. Never will I have a karaoke partner with such fine attention to the artistic subtleties of Sexbomb.

8, 9, 10. Hanoi:

I actually went to Hanoi 3 different times, but for the sake of clarity, I will combine them into one brief but telling experience. Perhaps you will recall from my previous post, that my travels in Vietnam begin and end with a snake. Well after 28 days of beach bumming, mountain climbing, waterfall scaling, mystery-food eating, unabashed shopping, karaoke singing, biking, hiking, diving and a handful of narrow brushes with an ill-fated death, on my last evening in Hanoi, I came face to face with an old friend. Hello snake. Hello Adam. Nice to meet you. Nice to eat you.